“Our assumptions control our interpretation of events, and they supply a great deal of momentum and direction for our lives.” (John Eldredge – Walking With God)
It is amazing how many times recently the realization of mine or someone else’s assumptions has been part of conversations. We each see life in very different ways than others simply because we come to the exact same situations with a whole different set of assumptions. This can get you going down the wrong path very quickly and lead to conclusions that are WAY off and dangerous.
One of the biggest of these assumption categories is making assumptions of other people. Whether it is their motives, desires, or beliefs, they are coming with assumptions and we are making our own assumptions. To complicate things more we communicate a lot these days through more impersonal ways like email, blogs, facebook, twitter, IM, etc. This is why I think the best policy is to always assume the BEST of other people. Mandy and I seek to do this in our marriage, and have to sometimes ask each other, “are you assuming the best of me?” Our staff team at work has a covenant with each other to always assume the best of each other. When people criticize me, I dig deep inside and ask God to give me the ability to assume the best motives and intentions…and when I do that, it usually is right AND I learn a whole lot more from the experience.
Thinking about it, I realized that our justice system is based on assuming the best. “Innocent until proven guilty” Some might say that this is a naieve approach which sets people up for being taken advantage of. And there are certainly people who, knowing I try to think the best, will seek to take advantage of a situation. But assuming the best doesn’t mean that you don’t gather the facts and seek the truth about a situation. And it is key to always be ready to have your assumptions corrected and act accordingly.
So, our assumptions range from what we think about God, to our life, to other people, to the mundane…but these assumptions all have a profound effect on the outcome in a given situation!
It may be difficult, but try it to have your assumptions challenged or extend an “assume the best” attitude toward a coworker, spouse, or friend, and see how many problems are solved!
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